I am a missionary. I've been to Africa 3 times in the past 2 1/2 years. I've spent 11 months at a missionary base in Zambia, Africa. I've spent the past 2 years solid working for a missions organization called Overland Missions. I've grown to love every one on my team like they're my own family. I need to go to school. I know that this is the next step that i'm to take in my life. Right now i'm still that Uneducated, telemarketing, homeless, missionary. In other words. I'm living with my amazing friend Amy and her Amazing family. But i was only supposed to be there for 2 weeks..going on 6 now i think. I work 11 hours a day. 7 in the OM offices, 4 as a telemarketer (i hate telemarketing...but definitely do not get mad when they call me now!). I was supposed to go to school this month...God closed the door right now. 5 months ago i talked about moving to colorado for school but decided to stay here for instate tuition and honestly to be with my friends, and work with overland. I have a whole year now where i can't go to school. I could go establish residency somewhere. Working with overland missions is a closed chapter in my life. It's a chapter that has BEEN closed for months...but one that i've tried SO hard to keep open. I can't move forward anywhere if i'm not moving forward in the area God wants me to be moving forward in. I'm not going to move forward in the ministry, i'm not going to move forward in a job... until i move forward with school. It doesn't make sense right now...I never wanted to go to college. I have grown to love the medical field though...so nursing makes sense. Anyway...
To make a long story short. Yesterday i stepped down from Overland Missions staff...to volunteer. That's ok. these past 2 years i've gotten such a beautiful taste of what i want to do with the rest of my life. My heart beats so hard for the nations...my heart beats for the mission field. I don't ever see myself leading huge teams. Theoretically one day i would love to get married...and travel with him to the villages, and islands that have yet to be reached with the undeniable, indescribable, love of Jesus Christ. Hey..that's a dream. I thought i didn't have any...but that's been a dream of mine for years. It'll happen. One day.
I'm scared. really scared. I'm not going to sugar coat it and say that i'm not. I know that whether i stay in cocoa, or move to colorado, or where ever.. that i need to make schooling my focus for awhile. Change is scarey sometimes...and i don't even have the slightest clue what is going to happen :)
Man o man. I might be a missionary...I might be an aspiring nurse...I might be a telemarketer...but that's not who I REALLY am...that's not my identity. I am a child of God. Simply put. That's my identity.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
No comments:
Post a Comment